F*** You Cancer by Deborah James

Today I went to see Deborah James and Lauren Mahon, from the You, Me and the Big C #youmebigc podcast, at the Henley Literary Festival. Deborah's book F*** You Cancer was published this week, and is already a best seller. It's a brilliant book, which I would highly recommend buying a copy. One in two people will be affected by cancer, so it's great to see these two inspirational women bringing cancer into the mainstream. The ladies paid tribute to the other member of the podcast, Rachael Bland, who, very sadly, recently died from breast cancer. I went wearing an Alarm t-shirt as Deborah recently met Jules Peters from the band, who is another inspirational individual living with cancer. I am working on Deborah becoming a fan! 😊

Today's event was held at Phyllis Court in Henley, and although I am local to the town and drive past it every day, I'd never been there before. In fact my mum was born only a few hundred yards from the venue in The Sun pub in 1936, which sadly is now offices. It was a highly entertaining hour, but also informative and talking about all the issues surrounding living with cancer. The good news is that the number one podcast will be back, and I think that this live event format could also be worth developing.. In fact so popular was the event today, that Deborah was still signing copies of her book as the next event was starting. 

Just over a year ago I met Deborah for my forthcoming fundraising book, The Record, which I am hoping will be published in spring 2019. It was a fascinating, and enlightening experience listening to her story, and talking at length about bowel cancer. Deborah, married with two young children, has an aggressive form of stage 4 bowel cancer. Since her diagnosis she has played a major role in raising awareness about the disease, as well as raising a considerable amount of money for cancer charities. She leads her life at 100 miles an hour - I would compare her to a human hurricane! She spoke with great passion about bowel cancer, but also with a lot of common sense. We chatted for about three hours with beers and wine as refreshments, and although the conversation covered every aspect surrounding her illness, Deborah was great fun, a master of fruity language, and with laughter never too far away. I will have to revisit the chapter on Deborah as so much has happened to her since our meeting.

Bowel cancer is the second highest cancer killer in the UK claiming 16,000 lives each year. However if detected early it can be successfully treated in over 90% of cases. A massive challenge is to improve the early detection rates giving more patients a better chance of living longer. At the moment only 15% of bowel cancer patients are diagnosed at the early stage 1. I am writing my new book in memory of my mum, who sadly passed away from bowel cancer in August 2016. All funds raised from sales of this book will be donated to Bowel Cancer UK (Beating Bowel Cancer Together), the UK's leading bowel cancer charity.

Meeting Deborah James for The Record

Coming up for a year ago, last September, I spent a really nice evening in the company of Deborah James in Richmond. She'd happily agreed to be in my forthcoming fundraising book, The Record, which I am hoping will be published in spring 2019. It was a fascinating, and enlightening experience listening to her story, and talking at length about bowel cancer. Deborah, married with two young children, has an aggressive form of stage 4 bowel cancer. Since her diagnosis she has played a major role in raising awareness about the disease, as well as raising a considerable amount of money for Bowel Cancer UK. She uses the "Bowel Babe" name on social media, and I would highly recommend following her. She leads her life at 100 miles an hour - I would compare her to a human hurricane! She spoke with great passion about bowel cancer, but also with a lot of common sense. Since her diagnosis she has undergone a gruelling course of chemotherapy as well as surgery, and not surprisingly there are times when she is completely wiped out, but she keeps bouncing back, and she refuses to let cancer rule her life.

We chatted for about three hours with beers and wine as refreshments, and although the conversation covered every aspect surrounding her illness, Deborah was great fun, a master of fruity language, and with laughter never too far away. She is a really inspiring individual, and it really is a great chapter for the book. Deborah is also involved in the enlightening and successful podcast "You, Me and the Big C" #youmebigc which is well worth checking out. The number one podcast features Deborah, along with Rachael Bland and Lauren Mahon talking about living with cancer. It will take you on a rollercoaster of emotions, but it's a brilliant listen. Very sadly Rachael died last week, so my thoughts are very much with her family and friends at this time.

Bowel cancer is the second highest cancer killer in the UK claiming 16,000 lives each year. However if detected early it can be successfully treated in over 90% of cases. A massive challenge is to improve the early detection rates giving more patients a better chance of living longer. At the moment only 15% of bowel cancer patients are diagnosed at the early stage 1. I am writing the book in memory of my mum, who sadly passed away from bowel cancer in August 2016. All funds raised from sales of this book will be donated to Bowel Cancer UK (Beating Bowel Cancer Together), who have recently joined together, to become the UK's leading bowel cancer charity. Please visit my ETSY online store where there is a whole range of items that can be purchased to raise funds for the charity. Over £4000 has been raised so far.

Cancer The Winning and Losing Myth

This week, Rachael Bland, the BBC journalist died. She was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2016, and she was a quite remarkable lady, who touched many people's lives. Alongside Deborah James and Lauren Mahon, the #youmebigc podcast has got people talking about cancer, and has provided invaluable help and support for so many patients and their families. However, I am not qualified to write a tribute to Rachael, and there have been some wonderful tributes paid to her by her family, close friends and colleagues. 

One of the topics discussed on the podcast was how it was unfair to label a patient's cancer being a battle, and something that you either win or lose. I have to admit that before starting work on the new book I did refer to mum's 'battle with bowel cancer', and 'losing her fight'. I have come to realise that I was wrong, and no longer use such terms in any of my writing. My mum didn't lose anything. She had no control over the cancer, and throughout the four and a half years managed to carry on living her life to the full, which was never defined by cancer. In terms of her treatment, Mum did everything that the doctors asked her to do with courage and dignity. If Mum had died from another illness I doubt the terms lost and battle would have been used. She loved a long and happy life, something worth celebrating. 

There are three photos above, and I have to pay these three ladies great credit, as it was my conversations with them for chapters in the forthcoming book, that played a large part in me coming around to a new way of thinking about the use of certain words and phrases. I met Janet Ellis at her house in London, and she told me about the workshops she has done on the power of words, such as 'battle', and 'fight', and the way she talked about it really made me think long and hard. I met Deborah James in Richmond, and although this was some time before the #youmebigc podcast, she had already become a major figure on social media in talking about bowel cancer, and raising awareness. I had a really good discussion with Deborah about words, and everything she said made great sense. Finally the other Deborah James, who sadly died in July 2017. We met in Northampton just a couple of months before she died. She was so nice, and I was very upset when her death was announced. She told me how she had become a self taught expert on bowel cancer, and would do everything possible to to defy the doctors and stay alive, but she said she had no control over the cancer.

Three hugely inspirational ladies, who have helped come to look at this all from a new perspective and I feel that I really did learn something so very important from these conversations. The new book continues to be an amazing experience, and I continue to learn, and hopefully develop into a better person. So these words and phrases have now been banished, and after the recent #youmebigc podcast talking about the words, 'death', 'died', and 'dying', and how they needed to be reclaimed for use in everyday language, I make no apologies for starting to use them more often now.

Back in March I contacted Rachael about being in the new book, and I was really pleased when she said yes. Unfortunately I never did get to meet her, which is a great shame, as everything she's achieved would point to Rachael making a great addition to the book. Even when time had become ever so valuable towards the end of her life, she still sent me a short message wishing me luck with the book, which means an awful lot to me now. My deepest sympathy and thoughts are with her family and friends. RIP Rachael Bland.